Hi... it's me!

Alright. i must admit i still miss her quite a bit. I'm not sure whether she knows about it. But never mind anyway. Because i have picked up the courage to delete all the nice-nice smses from her. Normally, when i'm trying to clear my inbox, means that i seriously want to be alone. So please leave me alone... I don't want to be seduced... Keke... By the way, i think no one will come to find me lah... which this kind of lousy physique and cock hairstyle.

The previous week was all about live range. Nothing really special. Probably the things that worth mentioning is the usage of live rounds (meaning you can kill with it, very easily), the usage of TRACERS (rounds with starwars effects), aiming at different targets, understanding my WIFE (rifle) to the slightest details like for example, i know where the rounds will end up when i aimed at this certain point. Guess the rifle really worked like a girl, you need to understand her well enough before you can shoot HER! ( pun intended ) Hahahaha!

So glad that i can get out of the place on a friday evening. The morale of the 136 diver trainees is settling in. Everyone is trying to be cooperative enough to book out for long weekend. Which was really what the instructors want to see. I can see that the instructors are not very demanding at this stage, they just want us to be more adapted to the group and depend on one another for bad times. I can see some improvement in the 25th batch in terms of discipline and standard. Let's hope that the improvements can go on.

I'm particularly happy with myself. I pushed myself backwards, a lot backwards, so that i can let the guys around me to shine. Which was really a good training for me. For years, i've been trying to outshine my peers, but why not try being a good worker for the leader? Let's hope i can learn something from this experience. And by the way, it's not that i can't compete with them, it's just plain boring to complete with blank brains. I was surprised i stayed cool for punishments, treat it like a short PT. Stayed cool for appointments for ICs. Stay cool for all the shit. Not much shit actually, but there's still more at times. Would want to make myself more cool-headed so that i can perform better in every move. Wouldn't want to be a compulsive decision-maker like what i used to be. Even though, last time, through compulsiveness, i managed to clear a lot of problems, but i believe stepping back would maybe bring me some other experiences that i may use to clear problems at the later stage of my life.

After being back to the mainland, i was quite shush with my movements. My parents didn't even know i'm back home until i come out of my room out of a sudden. Haha! Besides, i can't even sleep last night due to the lack of SEA sounds. Have been so used to the sea water rushing upshore sound, and the sea breeze. Even though the cool air is substituted by the air-con. But i don't get the nature sound that i could get from my five-star cabin at NDU camp. When i told this to many friends and even my parents, they say i'm actually having a good time at camp, leaving at such a prime place, practically at the beachline. Haha!

Today, i went to meet songzhen and christopher. It's been quite some time since i last spoke and met christopher. Not much of a change for him. Still as nice as BFG. Songzhen was unexpected turned for pretty. I don't know why. Maybe i went into camp, so my standard dropped. But really even though i know my standards may drop but it's still amazing to note that songzhen can dress well. Haha! Alright, we went to catch a movie COACH CARTER. Not bad. Very inspiring. Then i went to NYDC with songzhen. Talked a little more about her ex bf. Haha! It's so coincidental that yuanzheng is at town also. Haha! I went to my cousin's place after that. Guess i'm more controlled as a botak head. Tend to be less talkative. Guess i've learnt how to be quiet in the camp. Sometimes you just really have to keep quiet and control and gain some self-discipline. Hope i can really get through all the shit with zhaorong. Hope my pullups can be soon achieved.Alright... it's late. I'm too used to be sleeping early. SHall update more maybe tomorrow if i'm free. Bye for now!