No more life experiences until this shit is over...

I don't think i could blog anything interesting anymore.... With the A-levels coming, everything seemed so shitty to me. That includes friends who bug me to study, the inner-self of me who keep ringing to tell me to study, teachers who are checking on me, siyi who forced me to promise something that i didn't want. Just to inform you all, i've not given up hope, neither did i say i am holding on. I'm now in a state i enjoyed a lot... I love to give people the feeling that i'm studying, but then i'm not. I love to cheat people how much i studied but then actually i know nothing. Yes i know what all of you are thinking... I'm trying to cheat people cheat myself(in chinese). Correct? But i like it leh, what can you all do? Give me your helping hand? Give me more scoldings? Give me more encouragements? So nice of all of you... but does it help? Haha... Sorry to all of my dearest friends and especially siyi... No matter how much you all can do, it's just the moral support. How much is the moral support that could buy me a A-level Cert? Sad to say, it can't buy me one. So wasting your breath on me, isn't going to help at all. So must i really start work now? Am i hopeless? Being nice of all of you, of course you all say, "yes! you should start now, sure got hope one." Alright man, i know all of you are like thinking, you crazy! now then start work sure die one what. I ALSO KNOW! MUST WAIT UNTIL ALL OF YOU TO TELL ME MEH?! Sorry, i'm so rude. You all are trying to be nice, but i BU LI QING. I promise Siyi today i will study hard... So what if i break the promise... Does that make me a idiot?

I'm hopeless i know, don't pity me... I should pity myself first.
Don't scold me, cos i should scold myself first.
Don't try to give me a helping hand, cos it doesn't work. It sounds nice only!
Don't try to force me to do anything i don't like, I may go against it further.
Don't care about me... Leave me alone... Should i fail or pass this time...
It will be a decision that i make tomorrow.
Procastination, the best tool to avoid stuffs.
Laziness, the best tool to slack.
Both, my best friends ever since I'm young.
All of you don't try to sow discord.
I will choose to leave them if i want to...
How i wish i'm writing on a piece of paper so that all of you can see the amount of tear smudging the ink. Typing all this true words from the inside me isn't easy. It took tremendous courage. Cos i may lose a lot of friends and probably siyi too...